WAKE UP THE MASSES!!! This is Something Clever.
I'm gonna hit you with something heavy today. Normally, I'd hate to start the week like this, but I've been sitting on this experience for a while. Popular or not, I've got a point to make today.
Last week, I was in a Borders book store, looking for a specific book. For those that are uninitiated, a book is like a long magazine. Anyway, I had no luck finding the darn thing, so I asked an employee for some help. What happened next summarizes my feelings toward modern society...and almost made my brain explode. Here was the exchange:
Watts: Excuse me, sir. I'm looking for a book.
Book Boy: Do you know the title?
Watts: I think it's called...The Collected Works of Langston Hughes.
Book Boy: Like...you want all of his books?
Watts: No, the title of the book is "The Collected Works of Langston Hughes". It's a collection of his short stories and some poems.
Book Boy: Oh ok...
So, he walks over to his little computer to look up the author.
Book Boy: Langston Hughes...that author sounds really familiar.
Watts: Yeah, he's one of my favorites.
Book Boy: Is he the one that writes the vampire books?
Watts: He...wait, WHAT?
Book Boy: Yeah, is it the Vampire Diaries? Vampire Saga? Something like that?
Watts: Uh, absolutely not.
Book Boy: You sure?
Watts: Langston Hughes was a black writer and a driving force in the Harlem Renaissance.
Book Boy: -complete blank stare-
Watts: The urban evolution of African American art and literature?
Book Boy: -complete blank stare-
Watts: He peaked in the 1930's. He's been dead for a really long time.
Book Boy: Oh OK....oh hey! We have one copy of that book. Let me show you where it is.
He leads me around the store into the fiction section. Once there, we go to a "cart" that says 'African American literature'. The fiction section of Borders has about 4 sections of 3 walls each. Each wall is about 8 feet by 9 feet, full of books. Yet, the African American section is in the middle of one of those sections, on a cart. It probably has about 100 books.
Once we get to the section, he struggles to find the book, then asks for help. Another young girl walks over.
Book Girl: What's up?
Book Boy: I can't find this book by Langston Hughes.
Book Girl: Langston Hughes...where have I heard that name before?
Watts: Are you guys serious?
Book Boy: I thought it was the guy who wrote the vampire books.
Book Girl: He's not?
Watts: What is wrong with you people?
Book Girl: Oh, I know who it is!
Watts: You do?
Book Boy: Yeah, you do?
Book Girl: Yeah, he writes those erotic novels for black people?
Watts: Yea...wait, what?!
Book Boy: Oh, like Zane?
Watts: Hell no, not like Zane!
Book Girl: Yep, that's him!
Watts: Are you retarded?!
Book Boy: Dude, what's your problem?
Watts: My problem is: I'm wondering why you guys keep talking about vampires and porn!
Book Girl: Erotic fiction literature is not porn!
Watts: Please just stop talking!
Book Boy: Hey, I found it!
Watts: -long, exasperated sigh- thank you!
Book Boy: Is there anything else we can help yo...
Watts: PLEASE GOD, NO!!!!!!!
Amazing. I weep for today's youth. Let me describe this bookstore to you. The children's section took up half the store. There was one shelf of classic comics (Spider-Man, Batman, etc.) but three or four rows of Manga. There were more books about sensitive vampires than I'd ever seen in one place ever in my life. There was even a section called "Seen in the Movies." Yeah, a whole section for books that have been made into movies. Is that really the only way to get people to read anymore?
Here's another story. Did you know that in Europe, they get summer vacation? Yeah, they do. Like school. I'm serious. Germany, I'm told, gets 24 days. France gets a month. Do you know why? The Europeans are much more efficient than us. Their culture is smart enough to say that happy workers are productive workers, and thus, get more done. They're so efficient, that they can give their workers a month off or more in the summer, and not fear losing profit or progress. Americans, however, spend all their time at work playing solitaire, watching porn and going on Facebook. I'm not calling anyone out individually, but this is a commentary on our country as a whole. We work year round because we can't get anything done. We have limited vacation time because we hate out jobs so much, we'd never come home. We have limited sick time because we can't be trusted to only take it when we're sick. We don't have jobs that offer free child care and free school tuition because the lack of child care or education is a personal problem that the corporation does not care about. We're so wrapped up in working the system, we forgot to check to see if the system we have is working.
Western civilization is viewed as lazy, unintelligent, arrogant and overaggressive by almost everyone else in the world. Have you ever noticed that even the countries that we're on good terms with think we're stupid? As much as I make fun of Canada, they have free health care, free wi-fi and Scott Pilgrim. The UK has horrible food and bad teeth, but their money is worth almost twice as much as ours. Here's a fun fact: Did you know that other countries have started rejecting our exports? Yeah, it's true. And it's mainly applied to meat. They don't even want to eat the same stuff we're eating. Here's another one for you: The average IQ of an American is about 30 points less than that of a European or an Asian. EPIC FAIL.
So, what's my point? I've decided that I can no longer hate on other countries for the way they feel about us. We haven't exactly done a whole lot to endear ourselves to the other nations. Despite all of our failures, we still have an overall swagger of arrogance in this country. If the world was a high school, we'd be the hot, slutty chick. Some people want to be as close to us as possible, and some want to be as far away as possible. But everyone talks about us behind our back. No one respects us, not even our friends.
Last week, I was in a Borders book store, looking for a specific book. For those that are uninitiated, a book is like a long magazine. Anyway, I had no luck finding the darn thing, so I asked an employee for some help. What happened next summarizes my feelings toward modern society...and almost made my brain explode. Here was the exchange:
Watts: Excuse me, sir. I'm looking for a book.
Book Boy: Do you know the title?
Watts: I think it's called...The Collected Works of Langston Hughes.
Book Boy: Like...you want all of his books?
Watts: No, the title of the book is "The Collected Works of Langston Hughes". It's a collection of his short stories and some poems.
Book Boy: Oh ok...
So, he walks over to his little computer to look up the author.
Book Boy: Langston Hughes...that author sounds really familiar.
Watts: Yeah, he's one of my favorites.
Book Boy: Is he the one that writes the vampire books?
Watts: He...wait, WHAT?
Book Boy: Yeah, is it the Vampire Diaries? Vampire Saga? Something like that?
Watts: Uh, absolutely not.
Book Boy: You sure?
Watts: Langston Hughes was a black writer and a driving force in the Harlem Renaissance.
Book Boy: -complete blank stare-
Watts: The urban evolution of African American art and literature?
Book Boy: -complete blank stare-
Watts: He peaked in the 1930's. He's been dead for a really long time.
Book Boy: Oh OK....oh hey! We have one copy of that book. Let me show you where it is.
He leads me around the store into the fiction section. Once there, we go to a "cart" that says 'African American literature'. The fiction section of Borders has about 4 sections of 3 walls each. Each wall is about 8 feet by 9 feet, full of books. Yet, the African American section is in the middle of one of those sections, on a cart. It probably has about 100 books.
Once we get to the section, he struggles to find the book, then asks for help. Another young girl walks over.
Book Girl: What's up?
Book Boy: I can't find this book by Langston Hughes.
Book Girl: Langston Hughes...where have I heard that name before?
Watts: Are you guys serious?
Book Boy: I thought it was the guy who wrote the vampire books.
Book Girl: He's not?
Watts: What is wrong with you people?
Book Girl: Oh, I know who it is!
Watts: You do?
Book Boy: Yeah, you do?
Book Girl: Yeah, he writes those erotic novels for black people?
Watts: Yea...wait, what?!
Book Boy: Oh, like Zane?
Watts: Hell no, not like Zane!
Book Girl: Yep, that's him!
Watts: Are you retarded?!
Book Boy: Dude, what's your problem?
Watts: My problem is: I'm wondering why you guys keep talking about vampires and porn!
Book Girl: Erotic fiction literature is not porn!
Watts: Please just stop talking!
Book Boy: Hey, I found it!
Watts: -long, exasperated sigh- thank you!
Book Boy: Is there anything else we can help yo...
Watts: PLEASE GOD, NO!!!!!!!
Amazing. I weep for today's youth. Let me describe this bookstore to you. The children's section took up half the store. There was one shelf of classic comics (Spider-Man, Batman, etc.) but three or four rows of Manga. There were more books about sensitive vampires than I'd ever seen in one place ever in my life. There was even a section called "Seen in the Movies." Yeah, a whole section for books that have been made into movies. Is that really the only way to get people to read anymore?
Here's another story. Did you know that in Europe, they get summer vacation? Yeah, they do. Like school. I'm serious. Germany, I'm told, gets 24 days. France gets a month. Do you know why? The Europeans are much more efficient than us. Their culture is smart enough to say that happy workers are productive workers, and thus, get more done. They're so efficient, that they can give their workers a month off or more in the summer, and not fear losing profit or progress. Americans, however, spend all their time at work playing solitaire, watching porn and going on Facebook. I'm not calling anyone out individually, but this is a commentary on our country as a whole. We work year round because we can't get anything done. We have limited vacation time because we hate out jobs so much, we'd never come home. We have limited sick time because we can't be trusted to only take it when we're sick. We don't have jobs that offer free child care and free school tuition because the lack of child care or education is a personal problem that the corporation does not care about. We're so wrapped up in working the system, we forgot to check to see if the system we have is working.
Western civilization is viewed as lazy, unintelligent, arrogant and overaggressive by almost everyone else in the world. Have you ever noticed that even the countries that we're on good terms with think we're stupid? As much as I make fun of Canada, they have free health care, free wi-fi and Scott Pilgrim. The UK has horrible food and bad teeth, but their money is worth almost twice as much as ours. Here's a fun fact: Did you know that other countries have started rejecting our exports? Yeah, it's true. And it's mainly applied to meat. They don't even want to eat the same stuff we're eating. Here's another one for you: The average IQ of an American is about 30 points less than that of a European or an Asian. EPIC FAIL.
So, what's my point? I've decided that I can no longer hate on other countries for the way they feel about us. We haven't exactly done a whole lot to endear ourselves to the other nations. Despite all of our failures, we still have an overall swagger of arrogance in this country. If the world was a high school, we'd be the hot, slutty chick. Some people want to be as close to us as possible, and some want to be as far away as possible. But everyone talks about us behind our back. No one respects us, not even our friends.
I'd like to say that I have a solution to our problem, but just like all of you, I was raised and educated in the US. So, I've got nothing. The best we can hope for is individual improvement and success. Maybe that way, we can rise above the slumping statistic that this country has become. If that doesn't work, we should expatriate to Canada. That's all I can come up with.
America, as a concept, is over.
@GuiltyWatts
America, as a concept, is over.
@GuiltyWatts
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