This. Dumb. PLANET.
Wake Up The Masses!!! This is Something Clever.
It never ceases to amaze me when I see the things that people are talking about. For the last 3 days, I've heard more about the new iPhone than I've ever wanted to know. I keep hearing stuff about the World Cup, Steven Strausberg, Lindsay Lohan, and more and more things that I don't care about. It's hard to write about stuff when there's nothing worth writing. Then again, this whole blog is based on stupid stuff and things that don't make sense. As of now, nothing about popular culture makes sense to me. So I guess I don't have much of an excuse, huh?
iPhone 4
Let me make this as simple as possible. Everybody and their mother and sister and best friend have been talking about the iPhone. I don't want to fall into that category. So my feelings on the new iPhone are this: Apple made a great device, as always. But, once again, its not enough to counteract the dismal service that AT&T provides. That being said, I will not be buying one. Now, if you want one because of all the things it can do, and you plan to make full use of it, more power to you. If you want one because everyone else has one, and you like to show off your apps, and your phone has become more of a status symbol than an actual useful device, you're an idiot, you have no substance, and you need to get a life. Seriously, the people that rush to me to tell me about their apps and everything else they love about their iPhone need to get on a boat and sink. How empty is your existence that the only thing that brings you joy is being free publicity for Steve Jobs? He doesn't need your help, dummy! He's doing just fine! Get a life, or search the app store for something to keep you warm on a friend-less Friday night. You know that self-conscious feeling you have? That issue you have with low self esteem because you don't think you're good enough and you rely on the things you buy to gain the approval of others? Yeah, there's no app for that.
I have similar feelings about Droid-heads, but this blog runs on Google, so I'm not going there. Besides, I have no beef with Apple. It's their fan club that needs to get bent.
World Cup
OK, it's the World Cup. For the rest of the world, this is a very exciting time. I'm sorry, but all this hype does nothing for me. Soccer is so boring to me. I was raised in America, and we like Football and Baseball. They can have the World Cup, and I'll keep the sports I'm familiar with. What makes me mad is the people that think that Americans are horrible for not being interested in the World Cup. It's not racist to say that Soccer is NOT an American sport, and most Americans don't care. That doesn't make us dumb or uncultured, it makes us American.
"But Watts, you're wrong! Soccer is the most popular sport in the world!"
Yeah, the THIRD world, dummy!
The sport is popular in places where there's nothing to do. I promise, if you're a normal American kid, there is nothing in the World Cup that's going to compare to the NBA Finals or the last few Super Bowls. Be prepared...some people around you will hate on you for this. Probably not foreigners, they don't care much. But Americans who think they're "cultured" and second or third generation immigrants (you know, the ones that claim to be Asian or Mexican, but have never left the US, and the only thing ethnic about them is their last name) - these are the folks to worry about. But don't be afraid. You made it through the Winter Olympics, you can live through this.
Heck, the Winter Olympics were INTERESTING compared to this.
WOW, I've alienated half of the people who read this. I have no idea how I can top that. But we'll try...
Lindsay Lohan set off her drunky-ankle-bracelet again, but she's not going to jail. Oh, to be rich and white.
Steven Strausberg, the MLB pitching phenom, made a record setting debut with the Washington Nationals yesterday. Wow...to be rich and white...yeah, it applies here too, but in a good way.
They've re-made "The Karate Kid" with Will Smith's kid taking the place of "Daniel-San." Not sure how I feel about that. In fact, there's a whole slew of 80's remakes on the way: The A-Team, The Goonies, Voltron and Thundercats. Yes...Hollywood has run out of ideas. But if you're like me, you were born in the 80's, so it's cool, because you just keep living the same 20 years over again.
"Lets see...I spent last summer getting geeked for Transformers and G.I. Joe. Now, I'm hype for the A-Team and Karate Kid. Is it 1987 or 2010? Who knows?!?!?!"
And that's all for today, my friends. If you're not too offended right now, come back on Friday.
If I offended any iPhone users...good. You need to get over yourself.
Smile!
Watts
Wake Up The Masses!!! This is Something Clever.
It never ceases to amaze me when I see the things that people are talking about. For the last 3 days, I've heard more about the new iPhone than I've ever wanted to know. I keep hearing stuff about the World Cup, Steven Strausberg, Lindsay Lohan, and more and more things that I don't care about. It's hard to write about stuff when there's nothing worth writing. Then again, this whole blog is based on stupid stuff and things that don't make sense. As of now, nothing about popular culture makes sense to me. So I guess I don't have much of an excuse, huh?
iPhone 4
Let me make this as simple as possible. Everybody and their mother and sister and best friend have been talking about the iPhone. I don't want to fall into that category. So my feelings on the new iPhone are this: Apple made a great device, as always. But, once again, its not enough to counteract the dismal service that AT&T provides. That being said, I will not be buying one. Now, if you want one because of all the things it can do, and you plan to make full use of it, more power to you. If you want one because everyone else has one, and you like to show off your apps, and your phone has become more of a status symbol than an actual useful device, you're an idiot, you have no substance, and you need to get a life. Seriously, the people that rush to me to tell me about their apps and everything else they love about their iPhone need to get on a boat and sink. How empty is your existence that the only thing that brings you joy is being free publicity for Steve Jobs? He doesn't need your help, dummy! He's doing just fine! Get a life, or search the app store for something to keep you warm on a friend-less Friday night. You know that self-conscious feeling you have? That issue you have with low self esteem because you don't think you're good enough and you rely on the things you buy to gain the approval of others? Yeah, there's no app for that.
I have similar feelings about Droid-heads, but this blog runs on Google, so I'm not going there. Besides, I have no beef with Apple. It's their fan club that needs to get bent.
World Cup
OK, it's the World Cup. For the rest of the world, this is a very exciting time. I'm sorry, but all this hype does nothing for me. Soccer is so boring to me. I was raised in America, and we like Football and Baseball. They can have the World Cup, and I'll keep the sports I'm familiar with. What makes me mad is the people that think that Americans are horrible for not being interested in the World Cup. It's not racist to say that Soccer is NOT an American sport, and most Americans don't care. That doesn't make us dumb or uncultured, it makes us American.
"But Watts, you're wrong! Soccer is the most popular sport in the world!"
Yeah, the THIRD world, dummy!
The sport is popular in places where there's nothing to do. I promise, if you're a normal American kid, there is nothing in the World Cup that's going to compare to the NBA Finals or the last few Super Bowls. Be prepared...some people around you will hate on you for this. Probably not foreigners, they don't care much. But Americans who think they're "cultured" and second or third generation immigrants (you know, the ones that claim to be Asian or Mexican, but have never left the US, and the only thing ethnic about them is their last name) - these are the folks to worry about. But don't be afraid. You made it through the Winter Olympics, you can live through this.
Heck, the Winter Olympics were INTERESTING compared to this.
WOW, I've alienated half of the people who read this. I have no idea how I can top that. But we'll try...
Lindsay Lohan set off her drunky-ankle-bracelet again, but she's not going to jail. Oh, to be rich and white.
Steven Strausberg, the MLB pitching phenom, made a record setting debut with the Washington Nationals yesterday. Wow...to be rich and white...yeah, it applies here too, but in a good way.
They've re-made "The Karate Kid" with Will Smith's kid taking the place of "Daniel-San." Not sure how I feel about that. In fact, there's a whole slew of 80's remakes on the way: The A-Team, The Goonies, Voltron and Thundercats. Yes...Hollywood has run out of ideas. But if you're like me, you were born in the 80's, so it's cool, because you just keep living the same 20 years over again.
"Lets see...I spent last summer getting geeked for Transformers and G.I. Joe. Now, I'm hype for the A-Team and Karate Kid. Is it 1987 or 2010? Who knows?!?!?!"
And that's all for today, my friends. If you're not too offended right now, come back on Friday.
If I offended any iPhone users...good. You need to get over yourself.
Smile!
Watts
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