When you're ready, just push COSplay

EDITORS NOTE: Last week, Something Clever advertised Virgin Festival 2010. But there seems to have been some confusion. You see, tickets for the festival went on sale Saturday, and some seemed to think that the actual festival was Saturday. Let me clear this up:

The Virgin Festival is an outdoor concert being held on September 25th, 2010.

The event that happened Saturday was Comic Con, which is, essentially, a Festival of Virgins.

We apologize for the confusion.



WAKE UP THE MASSES!!! This is Something Clever. Here's the good word...


Crouching Virgin, Hidden Larper

No disrespect to nerds. I myself am a closet geek. But since we're talking about Comic Con 2010, lets get into one of the keynote events from this weekend. And no, I'm not talking about the Marvel Movie panel or the Scott Pilgrim pre-screening. I'm talking about a dude getting stabbed in the eye with a pen!

The details are sketchy, but basically, the story goes like this: Future Stabber is kicked by Future Victim. In an act of "self-defense," Future Stabber becomes Current Stabber and Future Victim becomes Guy With a Friggin Pen in His Eye.

What the heck was going on that nerd-violence was the only answer? This apparently happened during the Cowboys and Aliens panel. Was it that exciting? Was there that little space in there? Something tells me Green Lantern and Captain America were getting a little more attention than Cowboys and Aliens. But still, you get kicked and you stab a dude with a pen??? You chose a heck of a time to let out your nerd rage. What was it about that kick that sent you over the edge? Did he get dirt on your Harry Potter socks? Did he damage your Twilight skinny jeans? Whatever it was, you decided to get all "Call of Duty" on your nerd brethren and shank him in the eye with a pen that I'm sure had a toy light saber on the other end.

Well congrats, homie. I don't how they deal with stabbing incidents in Middle Earth, but in California, that's assault. You're definitely headed for prison. And you don't get to restart from your last checkpoint, or get out of jail by losing all of your equipment, or trade some gold and magic spells for your freedom. Nope, you're going to for-real-no-playing-around-hope-you-dont-get-butt-raped jail.

You will, however, earn 25 EXP...depending on how the butt rape situation turns out...


Well, this is a slow news day, so I'm just gonna keep going with the Comic Con stuff. Even though it's always descended upon by 35 year-old nerds who live with their moms, are usually unnecessarily condescending and have a very undeserved sense of accomplishment, drenched in pit sweat and shame, sporting a worn out Thundercats shirt from 1987...you know, I forgot where I was going with this...but honestly, Comic Con can be a really cool place. And here's a few short points I think you'll like:

Marvel Panel

The Avengers were officially revealed on Saturday. Mark Ruffalo is the new Hulk and Joss Whedon is signed on as director. I'd just like to point out that I said on this blog about six weeks ago that Joss Whedon would direct this movie. Now Yahoo! News and G4 think they got the news first. You guys ain't on Twitter like me! I'm all up IN that rumor mill!

Scott Pilgrim vs. The World

Outside of the fact that Michael Cera pretty much only plays himself in movies (an awkward, unlucky and funny looking kid who stutters) I think this will be a really good movie. It's by the director of "Hot Fuzz" and it looks like it's been done very well.


Batman 3

Nothing. At all.

Tron: Legacy

TOTAL NERD-GASM!!!!!

Cos-Play

I love it when a hot chick dresses up like Sailor Moon. But this is a warning, ladies: The famous "Slave Leia" costume is NOT for all shapes and sizes!

An affirmative YES

A huge, resounding NO.



Hope you enjoyed, hope it was funny, hope you click a link so I can get paid. Leave a comment, hit me up on Facebook and follow me on Twitter, @GuiltyWatts.

I'm gonna go conjure up images of "Slave Leia" in my head.






Watts